Giraffe Blogs 101: Blog #36 (banana80311)

Hey guys, welcome back to another giraffe blog for today, and today we'll be talking about how to order pizza in 6 ways: 3 on the phone and 3 at the pizza place (or wherever you're getting them).

ON THE PHONE

1. You: "Hello. I want a pizza with watermelon on it. Thank you for your cooperation. Good day." *Hang up as soon as you can*
2. You: "UM, HI I WANT A TACO."
Other person: "Um sorry sir we don't serve tacos here-"
You: "WHAT!!??"
Other person: "Uh, y-yeah, sorry about that, b-but we don't actually make tacos here."
You: "WELL THEN MAKE ME ONE! UGH...PEOPLE THESE DAYS...
Other person: "Uhhhhhhhh..."
You: "COME ON GET ON WITH IT!! CHOP CHOP!! I WANT THAT TACO IN 30 SECONDS. NOW." *Hang up*
3. You: "Hullo. Is this the dry cleaning service?"
Other person: "No, this is the pizza place. What would you like to order?"
You: "Yeah I would like my long underwear to be dry cleaned and be ready by 5:00 pm."
Other person: "Sorry, but I just said that this is the pizza place, not the dry cleaning place."
You: "Okay then. I would like the tower of Pisa to go please."
Other person: "Sorry but we don't own the tower of Pisa."
You: "But I thought you said this was the Pisa Place?"
Other person: "No I didn't. Now hurry up with your order. Our bread is getting dry, and I need to clean."
You: "Okay then. I would like my long underwear to be dry cleaned and be ready by 5:00 pm."
Other person: "We don't do that here."
You: "But I thought you said you dry clean here?"
Other person: "NO I DIDN'T."
You: "Okay then. I would like the tower of Pisa to go please."
Other person: "WE. DON'T. HAVE. THAT. I JUST SAID THAT."
You: "No you didn't. Fine, to make things easier for you, dearie, I would like my long underwear to be dry cleaned and be ready by 5:00 pm, AND the tower of Pisa to go please. There. Nice and easy."
Other person: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
*Hang up*

AT THE PIZZA PLACE

1. You: *Crawl into the pizza place and act like a dog and sniff around. Including the cashier.*
Cashier: "Excuse me sir, but what are you doing?"
You: *Sniff the cashier as if he/she has a very strong scent on them*
Cashier: "Um, sir...?"
You: *Act like an angry dog* "GRRRRRRRR RUFF! GRRRRRRRRRRR..........RAWR! RAWR RAWR RAWR RAWR!! GRRRRRRRRRR........"
Cashier: "Uhhhhh.....*Dials 911* Excuse me? But I have a strange situation here.....Please come as soon as you can...."
*Police comes*
Police 1: "What's going on?"
You: *Automatically start acting like a nice dog around the police* "Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.........." *Nuzzle the police's legs*
Cashier: "Um, yeah, here's the problem. Can you please get rid of this, thing?"
Police 1: "Y'know, we could actually use a good dog like this, eh?"
Police 2: "Yeah, good idea!"
Police 1: "Saaaayyyy......Would you, good cashier, look after this good dog while we go and ask our chief?"
Cashier: "UHHHHHHH........."
Police 2: "OK! THANKS! WE'LL COME BACK IN A FEW MONTHS. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!"
Cashier: "..."
Police 1: "OK BYE!"
You: *Start growling again hen the police leave*
2. You: "Hi, there. I just took a HUGE dump in your toilet and I think I plugged it up. It's like, loaded all the way to the rim. Do you mind cleaning it up so I can take another dump again? Ok. Thanks." *Start whistling and leave*
3. You: *Come in without saying anything and stare at the cashier for at least a minute*
Cashier: "Um, hi, what can I help you with?"
You: *Ignore EVERYTHING the cashier says and keep a straight face and keep staring*
Cashier: "Uhhhhhh..."
You: *Keep staring for a minute*
Cashier: "......"
You: "HI I WOULD LIKE OOOOOONNNNNEEEEEEE SOCK. BYE." *March out the door and act really happy*